How To Not Become My Landlord

Tuesday, 18 December 2007 at 6:00 am Pacific USA Time.

I have been looking at rental homes in my area. I found what I thought was a perfect on using the Multiple Listing Service. I contacted the owners and spoke to them on the phone. Based on that, here is your step-by-step guide on how to not become my landlord.

  1. List your property with a big YES next to pets. Draw me in.
  2. On the phone, completely grill me about my entire financial history because you happen to be a loan officer, and you’re approaching renting your house for $1595/month the same way you approach giving somebody a mortgage for hundreds of thousands of dollars.
  3. Treat me like you’ll take have to take whatever I look like on paper "into consideration" even though I’ve been renting for over 10 years, and have easily paid more than $1595/month in many places. I can document this!
  4. Tell me that it’s mort important to you to find someone who looks like they can afford this than to find tenants with certain personalities or renting histories.
  5. Keep telling me how you have already shown this house to two other people to whom you gave applications but haven’t returned them yet, so ya know, this house is really in demand.
  6. Make an appointment with me 4 days later to show me the house, and
    tell me you’ll call me that morning to confirm the property showing.
  7. Tell me that as soon as we get off the phone you’ll email me an application so I can get started, and submit it if I like the house.
  8. When we get off the phone, email me that you’re not sending me an application, and that you’ll give it to me when I come see the property.
  9. All this time, I’ve been talking to the wife, but have the husband email me an hour before I’m due to be at the property to tell me that you don’t want to rent to somebody with a cat. Nobody had the decency to call. They were lucky that I was here reading email rather than out, waiting for my cell phone to ring, and eventually knocking on the door of the home where they still live.
  10. Treat me like I’m a fool for not seeing where you wrote that you won’t consider cats and you’ll only consider dogs. But it’s not in your listing. And your realtor didn’t filter me out when I told her I had a cat. She had me call you. And your wife knew I had a cat, spent the whole conversation talking about my finances, and made an appointment for me to see the property. Please don’t treat me like I didn’t see your "no cats" declaration that wasn’t there. If you want no cats, your realtor should have filtered me out so that I never got grilled by your wife or had an appointment to see your rental home. Just a tip!

OK I get it! You are not going to be good landlords! I’ve got it, thanks! I wrote them back and said that as I was putting off seeing other properties because I thought theirs was going to be perfect, I would have appreciated hearing the NO CATS thing when they decided to not email me the application.

The housing market is still down. I have my pick of rental properties that have pools and accept pets in my zip code. Note to self, don’t rent from a loan officer or someone who treats you like one. Considering I’m leaving an apartment where I feel like the front office has no heart, no flexibility, and prefers that tenants lie to them, I think I should be more picky about who my landlord is. I can afford to be. :) Let the rental homes fight over me, the best tenant they’ll ever have. :)

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Categories: That's Bad Marketing

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